When Melancholy Hits You Hard

You probably think that I’ve been neglecting this blog for quite some time but that’s not the case, or probably the entire scenario…

All of us sometimes needs space to reflect, look back and tries to clear things out. For whatever reasons, it can and helpfully get us back on track.

Since this is a blog about being melancholic, I’ll start by posting what I placed in my instagram account awhile ago. Here it goes:

I woke up with a very heavy feeling today. And yet, my mind wants to remind me that even King David encouraged himself in times of his own despair.

In 1 Samuel 30:6 the author shared “And David was greatly distressed…but David encouraged himself in the LORD his God.” Life as we know it will always have its ups and downs. We look at it differently and sometimes jokingly. But in the end, it is up to us whether we want to stay where we are or we rise above the situation, continue to pursue the things we love, leave behind the things we fear or start back to step zero.

But it all starts and ends with God.

This is a long post but believe me, I’ll be back to post more #melancholic #musings because #melancholicmode is on and #reflections would jump up here and there.

So,there it is. After trying to overcome the sad melancholic mode for about 6 months, it hit me hard on my birthday that I’ll be forever be “melancholic” and a few days after, got rebuked that when life hits you hard – I don’t need to roll down with it, I need to rise-up, believe in the good things in life, encourage myself and get my act together because I am not yet done.


Christ Is Our Light

Spending my quiet time to understand darkness and light. Here are a few thoughts:

1.) A small light can illuminate the darkest place on earth. It symbolizes hope in our desperation, a glimmer of hope makes us jump in enthusiasm that something BETTER IS IN STORE.

2.) Light can overcome the darkness but not the other way around. Christ is symbolized as the light of the world. And because He is the light, darkness will submit to his power and authority.

3.) The break of dawn symbolizes a new day to ponder, to fight for, to live and enjoy. Hope is renewed, it rejuvenates and it allows us to give our best for the day once again.

Mark today as a new day filled with hope and positivity. It may be challenging to venture out but like darkness, it will not last.

If we are to change “light” with Christ’s name on it. It simply says that “Christ shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome Him.”

A Testimony Talk

“The moment we make our mess into a message of hope and the testings our testimony, we celebrate the victory we have in Christ Jesus.”

I had the opportunity to talk last night in a youth group about 1 Corinthians 13. By God’s grace, I hope I was able to present a very good and thorough explaination of what true love is, basing it in the written word of God, the bible.

Amazing things happen when you know God walks through the door and makes you tell your testimony to a group of youngsters.

Perhaps, I’ll share it here one time but for now, be praying to God about it. ūüėČ

Crazy Book Ideas!

Got a crazy idea? I had one (again!) and this time, I had the guts to ask a close friend working in a christian publishing company if they can have a book about stories of pastors who were led astray using drugs and how they turned that mess into a message.

With some little chat over Facebook and going through some Q & A portion from her, I ended up asking her to send me the “Book Proposal Submission Guidelines” that needed to be filled-out.


After browsing through the guidelines and questions to answer, I was shock that it takes not only guts to write a book but a lot of reflecting and rewriting to let the message through. Here’s one of my answer below that needed a lot of time to rewrite:

“The main theme of the book is about how God rescued individuals from drug dependence and made it a message for others to be set free as well. It was very evident that God made it possible for these pastors to have a way of escape and their lives were never the same….”

I’m honest enough to share that this is something that thrills me and will entail much time and research! With the issues and concerns of the drug epidemic today, their stories can personally bring a positive impact to our church community in the Philippines. And hopefully,¬†we as the church, to see the importance of taking part of God’s redemptive move for those enslaved by drug dependence. I hope that through this project, we can give light to the real issue and bring a different perspective with love and acceptance.

As a preview, here’s a chapter synopsis / abstract I’ve forwarded to my friend:

“Living in the limelight as an actor has its privileges but when everything turns awry by falsely being convicted of homicide, everything fell apart. His wife left him, his kids were misguided and yet he continued using drugs inside the city jail.

But one encounter inside the City Jail led him to meet Jesus at the crossroad but it didn’t just end there, he was set free from drug dependence immediately and the Lord paved the way for his parole after two decades in prison.

He now shares his testimony to different conferences and activities, giving hope that God can change our situation in the blink of an eye….”

Pray with me on this project and if you happen to know someone who has a story to tell, please share them to me by sending it through email at virsilva@gmail.com. God bless and thank you for reading! ūüėČ


Work Rants and Some Other Stuff…


I’ve been dreaming of applying for an online job. Although this may entail me to work on the wee hours of the night, at least I can have some spare time doing something else. Working for some time in the corporate world makes you see things differently. In a span of 15 days, I’ve noticed that I am spending more than 10 hours regularly ( averaging to 12 to 16 hours every other day for the last 3 weeks) to meet deadlines and joining meetings.

I also noticed a decrease in my sleeping habit and although there are good amenities in my room, I usually spend my days or nights on my bed rather than enjoying the perks of being single.

Recently, I’ve been asking my self what I really want to do in life. The crazy feeling of wanting to work online spurs me to look for some online job. The search seems to be as easy as 1,2 and 3 but getting feedback is definitely entails a lot of patience. I want to be in a work wherein I can be my own boss or should I have one, a client who is miles away from me. I love to work alone, finish projects and spend time researching and learning new stuff online. This is what drives me right now to be online most of the time.

But seriously, I will miss talking to co-workers on important stuff, spending time doing reports and spearheading coaching sessions as well. These are also important to make me sane from time to time.

Simply put, this rant is just to make me vent out on some stuff on my mind and get to understand the feeling of being free to do stuff, earn while doing the things you love most and grow in another level of maturity outside the four walls of the office.

How about you, how are you doing today?

Butuan City, Youth Camp and A Lot of Other Stuff

It’s the last day of April and I am excited to what’s in store for next month. For one, I’m going for the first time in 7 years back to the National Youth Camp, only this time, as a kuya. 

Butuan City, according to wikipedia:

Butuan (pronounced /buňźňątw…Ďňźn/), officially the City of Butuan (ButuanonDakbayan hong ButuanCebuanoDakbayan sa ButuanTagalogLungsod ng Butuan) and often referred to as Butuan City, is a highly urbanized city in the Philippines and the regional center of Caraga. It is located at the northeastern part of the Agusan Valley, Mindanao, sprawling across the Agusan River. It is bounded to the north, west and south by Agusan del Norte, to the east by Agusan del Sur and to the northwest by Butuan Bay. According to the 2015 census, it has a population of 337,063 people.[4]

I believe God is doing something in the city and we are all excited what He will reveal through this season. 

Please pray also for our youth group of twenty something as we travel from Negros Oriental to Cebu by bus and barge and by boat overnight all the way to Nasipit. 

Also,since it will be on a weekday, I’ll be out of the office for the entire week and my boss approved of it. Wohoo!

And oh, I’m also helping with some church stuff with NIHOP’s Negros Youth Convergence 2017:

So,it is going to be a hectic month on top of work so please pray for the following:

  • Provision for travel, the activities and for my family as well
  • Protection in all the travels, promotional stints for the events
  • Good health as I do stuff because you know how I become workaholic

I appreciate your reading and send me a comment if you agree with me in prayer! Salamat!

Things To Come (For Me) this 2011

2011 has finally arrived and to many of us, this is definitely a good year after everything that happened the previous year.¬†I’ve¬†been browsing through the pinoy blogosphere lately and noticed the emerging trend of posting about 2011 and the no. 11 respectively.

Most of the posts revolved around their New Year’s resolution(s), predictions, and expectations and among others for 2011. And after a couple of hours reading all about them, I finally decided to join in the fun by making NOT just one but three blog posts with the same topic.

You’re probably asking ¬†why I’m posting 3¬†separate¬†entries to one particular topic. I wanted to write a lot of things about this year. After some thought though, I realized that I need to¬†focus on topics related to:

What I want to have

(gadgets, investments and necessities)

What I want to do

(travel, leisure and fun)

What I want to accomplish

(related to work, family life and personal goals)

Why create one NOW?

There comes a time in your life that you realize you’re growing older and you want to accomplish a lot of things (that includes getting the things you want) before you turn 30.

Since the last 5 years of my life has always been about work and I’ve been intoxicated with it ever since, the next few years will be focused on things that is entirely different from what I’ve done before.

Honestly speaking, I’ve entirely forgot that life does not revolve with work alone but should include enjoyment and have fun along the way to balance everything. With that realization comes the idea on focusing my energy to things I love to do, I want to have and I need to accomplish.

I hope this makes sense to you and please expect more posts from me this 2011!

What am I passionate about?

I’m back in Bacolod City after a 2 day stint in Iloilo City. My weekend was definitely fun and exciting although it kind of hurt my pocket a bit specially that I paid personally for all of my expenses.

If in case you haven’t read my previous entries, I joined the 1st Visayas Blogging Summit and received a lot of freebies for the whole day event.The topics are awesome and made me think too much the next day to what I am passionate about.

I’m now contemplating on how to make good use¬† of everything I’ve learned. And I do hope that¬† if you’re one of the many bloggers who joined the event, – we’re on the same boat.

It would be a waste of money and time if the only purpose of being there was to have fun and meet new people. I mean, that’s part of the package but not the real deal of why we came,right?

My next few posts will focus on some good personal experience in how sulking in my hotel room made my day in finding my ” real passion” and how I will start doing it through a new blog. ūüėČ

Please do come back and read all about it!

The Good,The Bad and The…

The Visayas Blogging Summit 2010 was a good avenue to learn a lot of things on how to blog and how investing money, time and effort to write a good blog pays much. It was also a good opportunity to learn about making my blog interesting and earn an investment out of it.

Personally, I really appreciate the sessions about advocacy blogging and how blogging and social media affects the way we do things today. I would have wanted to sit down and do discuss about how social media and our blogs affect my work as a marketing coordinator for a BPO company but time did not permit me.

I know that there will be a lot of bloggers who will blog about their own experience and I’m excited to read every one of them. But for¬†this blog entry, I have entitled this one as ” The Good, The Bad and The…” to share about my experience, my take on the event and perhaps a little tip on how to improve for the next event.


Topics were very interesting and can be used to further someone’s craft as a blogger. From tips on how to create a good entry in making money online,one is sure to be excited to go home and blog about it. The other topics caught my attention as well especially in being actively involved (offline and online) for a good cause.

If I have the time, I’ll share some of those learnings here.

I strongly salute the organizers of the event, they were able to get a lot of sponsors and invited many speakers for the event. As per experience, you seldom get a lot of good speakers in one event and the Visayas Blogging Summit is one event that I would truly appreciate each topics and speakers in one way or another.

The topics were well thought of and definitely timely to the changing world of the pinoyblogosphere. It showcases that blogging is not just a hobby but a responsibility as well. (Bow to the organizers!)

I also love the freebies! I got a lot of freebies when asking 2 questions and just by being there. I seldom get a lot of freebies in an event so I’d say being in the summit is worthwhile. (Bow to the sponsors!)

Good food creates good vibes and with a lot of free food to munch and coffee to sip while feeling cozy sitting down is definitely a good experience. (Bow to the the food providers!)


Like what one speaker has said, “our views and opinions differs from one another” and I hope that what I will share be categorized as one and be accepted as constructive criticism rather than an insult to some of what I have to the organizers.

The Lights

SM Cinema 2 is a good venue for the blogging summit, I guess my only concern are the lights! It could have been better if we have the venue brighter. The speakers would have been able to interact more if they see the faces of those who were asking, know if their audience are still listening and the like.

The Topics

I love the topics discussed from start to finish but we only have limited time to dig deep about each one. I personally wanted to learn more about how digital media affects businesses since I am working in a company who just started investing with social media.

Some of the topics could probably be combined and have longer sessions ( 45 minutes…) and can include a 15-20 minutes workshop. This way, bloggers will have 1st hand experience on how to do these stuff and not just in theory.

Also, there were probably some people who had “information overload” considering that we have a variety of short topics in one day. Longer sessions with less topics is the best way I guess to focus on some essential¬†topics in giving a broader perspective in terms of essentials, profitability and marketing tips that would make effective blogging – newbie or not, a success.


The 1st Visayas Blogging Summit is an effort to accomplish. I remembered my days when I tried working my ass out to promote and there were only a few who really came. Just to note, an event is not considered a success only out of the number of attendees but also of the quality of output afterwards. The real achievement perhaps is to see people blog out of passion, find their niche and become responsible individuals (online and offline) creating impact to our society and the country.

To end my blog post, I would say that the 1st Visayas Blogging Summit is definitely A-OKAY! I salute all the organizers who have exerted effort in making my first summit experience the BEST!

The “UNDAS” Holiday

I still remember my younger years when I play around the cemetery every November 1. I used to play hide and seek and jump around the tombs with my cousins and friends. It was definitely a good memory.

I also remembered doing business out of the melted candles by filling up a tin can and then selling it for a good price (for a kid,P 15.00 was okay!).

Trying to relive those memories let me understand that sometimes our holidays are not to celebrate (or in this case) remember important people in our lives but just to relax and unwind from the busyness of life and skipping diets.

After two blogs about work, it’s time to let go of the bitterness of toxicity and embrace the challenges by placing it in the right hands – God’s.

Church yesterday was also a good experience after a month of not being able to go for Sunday service because of work. I fully understand the reason why God really rested on the 7th day.

For the rest and the Undas holiday,surely this is a great experience!

A Lesson About Pressures and Prayers

You might have read my previous post days ago about my current experience with work and the pressure of meeting the demands of the job. That post helped a lot in making me realize a lot of things as much as clear my mind on what to do and not to do.

First of all, the blog post was a rant to express my uneasiness. I was uneasy being pressured as if I’m not doing good with my job. In reality,I had a lot lapses with the stuff I made and it’s really hard to come across people who scrutinizes our mistakes and not see the entire outcome of an event. It really added insult to the injury.

But our God is gracious, He has taught me to be patient and forgiving. I love to sulk in the idea that people hates me but it’s more fun to let go of that thought and move on. I’ll try my best to be friendly and do as much as I can with regards to my job. I don’t want to hold grudges considering that we still have one big mountain to climb before 2010 ends.

Another good lesson the Lord has taught me is that pursuing an excellent job doesn’t mean that we are exempted for failure. There are times when everything that we’re doing seems meaningless (like the author of Ecclesiastes have mentioned).

There will also be times when we forget to do the most important and necessary things to accomplish a good project. I don’t want to make it a lame excuse that we’re human and is prone to err but I have to agree that there are some things that we don’t have a hold of and what we can only do is learn from it and move on. Once we encounter the same issues,we better not do the same mistakes again.

Excellence as I come to know it is measuring up to your own capabilities and not of others. I now partially understand that an excellent job is making sure I did my very best (even when there are lapses) and then, on bended knees asked the Creator of Heaven and Earth to help me. True excellence is when I humble down at the feet of my savior for help and just exhaust myself in prayer.

To sum it all up, I strongly¬†believe that with prayers and a little faith from the Lord can do so much! Thank you Lord,you made me realize that pressure is part of life but when we’re down on our knees,anything can happen especially when all things seems to be bleak!

Fridays, Families and Fun!

Travel from Bacolod to Dumaguete usually takes 6-7 hours compared to the usual 5-6 hours by bus. It will also depend on the driver since some are really good at beating curves and are faster to a few who are like driving a tourist bus who stops a lot of times even when people are already in standing position or otherwise. But I guess I can only rant about it since the business really is for them bring “good bucks” after every trip.

Does it look familiar?

The travel might be long, bumpy and tiring most of the time but nothing really beats going home.

I can do a lot of stuff here in Bacolod ¬†City but there’s nothing compared to having the comfort of your home with family and close friends. Good times at home will always include chit-chat every now and then – and good & home cooked food is a plus!

The warmth of open discussions with my siblings and relatives makes me feel excited to come home often as I could. Unlike before that all of us can meet during Saturday dinner or Sunday lunch, right now we can’t even meet without planning it ahead of time.

Giggles from my nephews and nieces when I’m with them are good stress-relievers. Watching Disney movies are always a good past time to reminisce of the past, learn valuable family lessons and just laugh your heart out to simple jokes and mishaps of the characters in the movie. Geez, they really do bring out the “kid” in me and I can just be who I am with them.

Now, I’m not saying that I don’t like Bacolod and it’s a wrong choice to work here. I love it here as well. I’ve made some good friends in the city and I’m having a good blast meeting new people and just stay in the “City of Smiles”. I guess I’m still craving for those activities I can do with less money involved and much more church participation on weekends.

And since tomorrow is a weekend and I have a few bills on my pocket, I guess I’d pack up a few things and go home again tomorrow. It’s less expensive, full of fun and definitely a bumpy ride once again!

Excelling but Not Competing

I admire people who excel in what they do. Whether it’s about sport, entertainment or work – people who excel are recognized and is fun to be with. I think it’s¬†innate to us Filipinos to be part of a group where successful people dwell. It might be thought of as social climbing but honestly, we just want to have what they have and even sometimes become better than they are.

But how do we really excel in our work and yet not compete with others (and compare ourselves with how others work?)?

Working in a competitive company might let you think that in order to move up in the ladder of success, one must continually fight for it. Some people I know of has the habit of putting the blame to others and making sure that the “glory” be on his head. Other people also are “power hungry” that they belittle other people (even OJT’s!) because they want to feel successful.

To be blunt about it, success is nothing compared to being excellent. Success can always be taken away from you but excellence (in all that we do) can be a blessing of a lifetime. Excellence is much more precious than success, it develops in us the character to do better and improve while success can only do much as to measure your doings to other people’s accomplishments.

Given that excellence is better than success, the real deal really is not fighting to compete to become successful but fighting with self to become excellent.

What do I mean by that?

My own definition of excellence is that doing things above and beyond what I call mediocre results because you want to improve the way you do things. It’s the idea that we thrive hard to do good in our job not because we want to brag about it but we want to be recognized by the company and the people we work with even when not saying a word about it.

A few years ago when I was still starting with my work in the corporate world, my performance was not bad nor was it really good. My boss told me one time that there were lapses in how I did things and challenged me to become better since it will be part of my evaluation for regularization.

At first, I complained and tried to measure myself by saying that’s the only thing I can do and pushing me won’t do any better. Well, I was still young and new at corporate work so I guess you have to forgive me about my foolishness.

After much thought and wanting to be part of the company, I tried to do stuff beyond my capacity and call of duty. I followed the advices of my boss and wrote down the areas for improvement on a piece of paper and tucked it in my wall for remembrance. I made sure that when placed on the same situation again, I’ll do better.

And I did.¬†The next evaluation that I got was from Developing to a successful plus (I jumped over the successful level)! All I did that time was do more than what was expected. I became proactive and diligent, making sure everything is aligned and I’m hitting my targets.

What did I do to excel? Here are a few things that I still do right now to ensure that I’m on the right track –

  1. I write down my tasks and other important things to be done on a journal/notebook – it’s always present on my work desk and every meeting. It’s filled with scribbles and notes that only I can read.
  2. I place quotes on my cubicle’s wall about excellence and work – this way, I have a vision of what I want to do and become. It also pushes me not to become complacent about my usual tasks.
  3. I have calendar reminders activated for schedules of reports, meetings and important tasks that requires much attention than the others.
  4. I pray when stress heats up and try to stay cool by listening to relaxing music while doing work. It’s the best stress reliever!
  5. I make sure that work and fun is balanced. Taking time to do things you love (not related to work!) can rejuvenate you once you get back to work.
  6. I practiced saying “I’ll see what I can do” instead of the “No,it’s not possible” and do something about it.

You might notice that the things I’ve mentioned above doesn’t do with anything that requires you from making sure that your ahead with someone else. That’s because I don’t want to compete with someone else for a position. Although the craving to have more is there at many times of the day, I always ensure myself that if I want to become the boss, I have to be master of my own pride and become humble, continuing to do work and ad hoc tasks even when no one is watching.

Excellence is not about competing or comparing yourself to others but measuring yourself and your capacity to improve and become better. You read it right, it’s a fight against yourself and your own “devils” and not about the other person on the next cubicle or your boss. It’s a battle of the heart and the mind.

Trying to measure up to our boss’ expectations is good but we must also understand that there needs to be a time of transition especially when we are new at our work. We might feel burned-out immediately should we want to do so much in so little time. Take time to breathe,examine and research.

One good example is how I am doing right now with my new company and how I tried to measure up myself only to find out that I’m still 2 months old in the company and have been doing things so much than what the others were able to accomplish before me for a year.

There needs to be balance especially when you’re transferring to a new company or else, you’ll end up the same pit and reason why you resigned from the previous company.

Before I forget, excellence doesn’t mean being perfect. Perfection can be a good tool but making mistakes and learning from it is a good experience. It drives us to be better and get things done – which is the very core of excellence!

Thank you for reading!

The Need to Change Tactics

There is this idea in war games that when something that the team has been doing for quite a while is not working or has the least expected results,they have to change tactics.

Like any blogger who tried so much to make a name in the Pinoy blogosphere, I too definitely needs to change my tactics.

After 5 years of blogging as a melancholic I finally realized the truth about my posts – and its way too bad than expected!

Except for a few posts about activities and spiritual lessons, most of my posts were too melancholic and in nature “too emotional” at times. Coming to terms in choosing to dwell in the emotions has it’s toil for the past 5 years and I guess it’s time to move on and get positive about life!

Thus came the idea of creating a blog project I’d like to call as “The Alter Ego Project”, a blog that will document the positive side of me – not too melancholic but pretty much sanguine.

Sanguine ‚Äďan adjective that means cheerfully optimistic, hopeful, or confident: a sanguine disposition; sanguine expectations. – Dictionary

The main goal really is to post an optimistic approach in my outlook in life and to the things happening around me. And I’m positive that I’ll be able to accomplish this goal moving forward.

For some of you who are (wishful thinking!) following my previous blog, you can still get something out of that five-year blog but I consider this new blog as a new haven for positive and encouraging start of something new and better for me!

Thank you for reading!

The Alter-Ego Project

The Alter Ego Project is the not so common blog of Vir Antonio Silva, a late-twenty-something single person working in Bacolod City. He created a dozen of other blogs that have lasted only a few months or so with the exception of his personal blog, Melankoliko Dialogo.

He has been dumped a couple of times but still believes in love-at-first-bite err…I mean sight!

He’s cute, definitely a workaholic and is melancholic. But not to defer him from being adventurous, a groupie and movie buff – He finally decided to create a blog about the not-so-mundane-life of everyday living in a new place, working in a new company and a new blog (because He plans to trash the old blog of 5 years!).

One of his greatest dream is to become a prolific writer sharing stories and insights about life and among other things but often fails in trying.

If you want to get to know me send me an email and who knows, I might reply.